People get angry. Usually our anger passes. We get over it. We’ve either expressed our feelings, forgiven another, or thought it through and let it go. However, there are times when our anger doesn’t easily dissipate or we thought we let it go, only to discover that something has triggered the old anger once again.
I receive a lot of emails from spouses complaining that their other half is always angry—angry at them, angry at the world.
Here are some questions to ask yourself (or your significant other) when your anger doesn’t seem to go away or stay away very long.
- What resolution am I still waiting for--an apology, justice, a different outcome, agreement, or simply getting my way? Sometimes you just can’t get what you want. Having the grace to move forward in your life instead of getting trapped in a temper tantrum is what separates the victims from the victors. Which one do you want to be?
- Am I willing to accept that I may not get what I want? Am I able to let go and surrender to what is? Acceptance is the doorway to making powerful choices and creating the life you want.
- Can I forgive? Forgiveness is the antidote for anger. It brings you peace and allows you to move forward in your life with power.
- Can I choose to make a different choice and take a different action that will result in a different outcome? It may not be what I wanted in the first place but it is something I can live with.
- Can I settle into being with the unknown and letting things work out naturally? Sometimes the universe has a better plan in mind. When you’re patient and able to sit with the unknown, magical things begin to happen. Give it a try.
So the next time you find yourself or your significant other stuck in their anger, take the time to see what you’re willing to consider. And if you choose to stay angry, then own it as a choice. There’s power in that as well.
If you or someone you know needs help in understanding what their anger is all about and letting it go, don’t hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized counseling and coaching. Take advantage of the opportunity to receive the support and guidance you deserve. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today.
About me: www.julieorlov.com/about
About The Pathway to Love at-home program: www.julieorlov.com/pathway-to-love
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Today's question deals with how difficult it can be to forgive someone who has hurt or disappointed you. This video Q&A talks about the power of forgiveness, how to move from anger and defensiveness toward forgiveness and why it will set you free!
Click “Read in Browser” to access the video. And for those of you that rather read than watch, enjoy my article on the topic entitled “The Art of Forgiveness” right below the video.
To view on YouTube, go to http://youtu.be/5BqKDzWP2dY
It’s been about a year since this video was featured in my weekly articles. As the topic is so important, I wanted to revisit the topic of forgiveness. We often stop ourselves from forgiving because we think that in doing so we will be condoning the behavior that hurt us. We also think we can somehow hold on to our power and protect ourselves when we hold on to our righteous indignation, anger and hurt.
In truth, the opposite is true. Through our forgiveness we gain back our power, find compassion and connect with love and respect for self and others. It is through our forgiveness, that we win.
So enjoy this encore of Love and Relationship Q&A w' Julie Orlov "Why is it so difficult to forgive?" Today's question deals with how difficult it can be to forgive someone who hurt or disappointed you. Listen as Julie Orlov talks about the power of forgiveness, how to move from defensiveness toward forgiveness and why it will set you free!
You can view this video on YouTube at http://youtu.be/5BqKDzWP2dY or click read in browser to watch it on my website along with many other videos and articles designed to help you create strong and intimate relationships in every area of your life.
You know you f#@%ed up. You said something horrible to your mate or betrayed your mate in some way. You get it. You have acknowledged your wrongdoing and have apologized. You believe forgiveness is warranted and are ready to move on.
Your mate, however, is not ready to move on. She is still angry, hurt, and wounded. Trust has been broken and she is not ready to forgive. She is still hurting and still needs to make you understand just how hurtful your actions were. She’s still trying to understand why you would say or do what you did. She is still bleeding, emotionally that is…
You feel you’ve been punished enough. You don’t want this mistake to haunt you for the next two months or years for that matter. You’ve had enough and are ready to move on. You resent this continuous admonishment and want her to stop. You shut her down, saying “no more—I’ve apologized and that’s all I can do.” Or is it?
Every couple will experience a situation like this from time to time. So what lessons can we learn from the scenario above. How can you move through a crisis in a way that promotes healing? How can you move through your crisis without causing more upset and delaying the healing process?
Here are 8 things you can do to to help you and your partner move past crisis toward healing and intimacy.Click read in browser to access full article