The Number One Myth My Clients Believe

I have worked with all kinds of clients with all kinds of issues over the years. The number one myth that people believe is that once you have an “ah ha” moment and “let it go” then the issue will be gone forever. Never will you have to feel the pain associated with the past; never will you have those disturbing thoughts that stem from outdated beliefs about what happened and what you made it mean.

Here‘s the truth. You can have an insight; you can understand what makes you tick and why;you can release the feelings and beliefs associated with the past. And, it is quite probable that those automatic reactions, beliefs and feelings will surface once again. You can forgive someone for deeds done and understand that it is quite possible, even probable that you will need to forgive that same person for the same deed again and again.

It takes a long time—some would say a lifetime—to truly let something go. It’s like building a muscle. You need to continually work on developing the skills to recognize when something from the past has been triggered again, engage in a reality check, remind yourself that the old way of reacting no longer serves you and your relationships, and let go, once again.

It is through the practice of letting go that true letting go occurs. A wise person knows that the body and mind have a powerful memory. It takes time and repetition before the body and mind will release their grip on what they thought was so. It takes time and repetition to reassure the body and mind that it is safe to let go and adopt a new way of thinking and being. And, it takes time and repetition to acquire mastery in this process.

So the next time you say, “I thought I was past this already; what is wrong with me?“

Simply respond by saying “Nothing is wrong; I simply need to let go… again.” 

And one day you just might discover that old issue has lost its grip and a new perspective is alive and well.

If you or someone you know is struggling with letting go of old issues, feelings and beliefs, don’t hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized counseling and coaching. And if you want to start right now, go and purchase The Pathway to Love at-home program. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today.

Take advantage of the opportunity to receive the support and guidance you deserve. 

Be well,

Julie

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

 

A Word Can Paint a Thousand Pictures

I was innocently making a request to my significant other last week and used a word that set off quite a reaction in him. It reminded me that we are always walking in a land mine without knowing it. We go about our day communicating without much thought. We tell people what to do, what we need, and how we feel. We ask questions, make requests, and set limits. And we do this with words. For most of us, our word selection is based on our ongoing developing vocabulary, words and phrases we’ve grown up with, or words and phrases we’ve picked up from the people in our lives. We rarely think much about the words we choose. We typically use words that we’re familiar with and that will take care of our communication needs with efficiency and ease. Quite frankly, our daily use of words is relatively limited when compared with the number of words available to us in the English language.