Is Your Spouse Your Roommate or Your Lover?

You can't believe it's summer already. Another school year has gone by. You are trying to decide where to go on vacation and any idea you have seems like a lot of effort. If you're really honest, the idea of a family vacation seems exhausting. Taking a long weekend away by yourself sounds so much more enticing. You look across the kitchen table at your husband. He is busy writing out checks and reminds you that he will be working late next week so you will need to pick up the kids from their various afternoon activities.

Things are comfortable between the two of you. After all, you’ve been married for almost two decades. The household runs smoothly. The kids' needs are taken care of. But you realize that you and your husband have settled into a life together that feels more like roommates and less like lovers. Over the years your sex life has slowly withered away to an early morning quickie every other month or so.  You think back on the days when your sex life was good. You made an effort to wear sexy lingerie—he made an effort to seduce you in the ways you liked—you both made an effort to mix it up and have fun. Now it seems like passion is the last thing on your minds, settling instead for a comfy night on the couch watching TV until it's time to get some sleep. And while you still have warm feelings for your spouse, that flame seems almost extinguished. Tonight as you sit across from your husband, you feel lonely, longing to reignite some passion—longing to look at him as your lover, once again.

If this scenario sounds familiar, you are not alone. Many couples after some years have gone by, or when the kids have moved out, look at each other as if they were compatible roommates. And for many, there comes a time when that comfort level is no longer acceptable. Couples hit a cross road every few years and for most couples, this cross road will be met at least once, if not more, throughout the lifetime of their relationship.

If you are experiencing the roommate blues, here are five things you can do to bring passion back into your relationship. Click Read in Browser to access full article

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Dealing With “The Empty Nest”

Many parents, who have devoted their time, energy, and identity on parenting, hit a crisis when the children are gone. Many couples, who have devoted their time, energy, and identity on parenting, will also find themselves in crisis when their last child leaves the home. This is not only common but a natural milestone that couples hit as they move through their lives. This time of year is the time that many young adults leave the nest for college or for good. It is important to address all the issues that surface during this important milestone, both on an individual as well as relational level. Here is my 4 step process for dealing with an empty nest.

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When Baby Makes Three: Nurturing Your Marriage While Nurturing Your New Baby

Having a baby is one of life’s greatest moments. In one instant, your life becomes completely transformed—before your life consisted of work, play, and rest—now it is consumed with a new love, a new responsibility, a new meaning. There’s nothing more powerful and nothing more demanding. Most couples are thrilled with the birth of a new child. And, most couples are overwhelmed with how to juggle the demands of a new family member while still maintaining an intimate connection between each other. Research has shown that couples with children under the age of five experience the highest marital stress. Making the transition from two to three requires a major overhaul in how you manage responsibilities, time, energy, and support within your relationship. Here are five ways to help you move through this momentous transition.

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