A Friend Died Last Week

Terrence Wing was my friend and colleague.  He was a role model for leadership, integrity, kindness, generosity, and spirit.  He died suddenly and was in the prime of his life. Since word spread about his untimely death last Thursday, there has been an enormous outpour of heartfelt sentiments.  Terrence meant a lot to me.  And it was clear he meant a lot to many.  He will be missed and the world has lost one of its shining stars.



Terrence continues to teach me in his passing.  He was a strong advocate for social media and was an active member in his twitter and Facebook communities. And while some people dismiss the technology, stating it creates distant and artificial relationships, Terrence has proven otherwise.  All you need to do is read the comments and tweets scattered throughout the net and it is clear how powerful and intimate this technology can be.  Terrence teaches us that it is the person behind the words that creates the connection, not the technology.  Terrence teaches us that the technology enables us to stay connected with old friends and colleagues while creating new ones around the world.  His impact was far reaching.  His spirit, intelligence, and humanity came through whether you knew him in person or online.

I share my own personal loss with you because it acts as a reminder to us all.  I’m sure you have had your own personal experience of losing someone unexpectedly—those untimely deaths that leave you wondering if you had taken enough time in recent days to let that person know just how much he/she meant to you.  So often we get caught up in the everyday treadmill of getting things done and keeping up.  And while we know how our lives are touched and enriched by those around us, sometimes we forget to share those thoughts as we go about our daily lives.  So here’s the lesson I am passing on to you on behalf of Terrence.

Don’t forget to tell the people you love that you love them.  It doesn’t matter what form this takes—be it a tweet, text, hug, letter, phone call, post, talking quietly at home, or invitation to lunch.  Don’t put it off.  You simply never know what today, let alone tomorrow, will bring. Our technology actually makes it easier for us to let people know how much we appreciate who they are and how they contribute to our lives.

Don’t take people for granted.  Don’t take your relationships for granted.  I’ve always said that our relationships are the most important assets we have in our lives.  At the end of the day, it is the people and the quality of our relationships that matter, nothing else.

So please go home and hug your kids, kiss your significant other, call your parents, send your best friend a card, and say thank you to your co-workers for a job well done.  The gestures count.  The words mean something.  The sentiments create connection and community.

Good-bye Terrence.  Rest in Peace.

Be well,

Julie

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Create Relationships in Your Life That Work — learn more at www.julieorlov.com 

Comments

[Christina Bayma]

Terrence will be sorely missed and it's such a shock to have lost him. The picture you posted of the two of you truely embodies the happy and loving spirit Terrence imbued. May we all pass through life touching people's hearts and spirits with positive energy and love as Terrence did.

[admin]

Thank you for reaching out and commenting Christina. It always help to connect with others who share in your loss.

[Javier]

I'm shocked to hear this, Terrence had and will have a contagious spirit that will last forever.

I know for sure the ASTD community around the world lost a great collaborator and entrepreneur, and great american.

Keep teaching us from the sky Terrence

[Nigel]

Again, One of the nicest people I have ever had the pleasure to know........
His Mom, God rest her soul, was the same way.....