When Is It Time to Pop the Question and Say Yes?!

I was thinking the other day about marriage. My marriage—or better stated—my future marriage—or not. I have been living with my significant other for over a year and the question of if and when to take the next step has been on my mind. I have been married before and know what it’s like to have a good marriage, an okay marriage, a bad marriage, and an even worse divorce. Since my divorce, I’ve gone through stages when I’ve been fairly certain that a second marriage was unnecessary, especially since I have raised two children on my own.  I’ve also gone through stages where the idea of being married one more time seemed appealing and desirable (remember, I did have a few good years with my ex-husband and know what a good marriage feels like).

Deciding if and when to get married is a serious matter. And if you are a veteran of one or more marriages that have ended in divorce, the decision weighs more heavily. You know what it takes to divorce—it is not for the faint of heart. And if you have never been married, you are certainly aware of the fact that over half of all marriages end in divorce—and have probably witnessed a friend’s or family member’s ugly divorce at some point in time. 

So I started to think about what would have to be in place in order for me to take that next step. I also started to think about what my significant other would have to have in place before he was ready to take the next step. Then I thought of all of you. After all, you have entrusted me in providing you guidance and wisdom on how to navigate your relationships. The least I can do is share with you what I’ve come to understand about myself and the question of marriage...

...So I decided to tackle the question of “Do I want to get married?”...

To help you make this life altering decision, I've come up with my top ten questions to ask yourself—and your significant other.... Click Read in Browser to read full article

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WHAT HAPPENED TO MY EMPTY NEST? - What to Do When Your Grown Children Move Back In

With graduation coming right around the corner and the economy still lagging behind, many new graduates will be coming home—to stay—at least for a while. And that’s not all. Many older independent adult children who have been laid off or have had difficulty launching their careers find themselves reluctantly knocking on their parents door, needing a place to live until they find a way to get back on their feet and make their own way. While some parents may welcome the return of their adult children, going from dependent teenagers to independent adult roommates may not be as easy as it seems. Many single parents and couples find it challenging to lose their sense of freedom and privacy just at a time when the have come to embrace and enjoy their “empty nest.” There are many challenges parents face when their adult children return home. These include

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Let Go and Let In!

Change and transitions are not only a necessary part of life, they are a blessing. They allow you to meet new people and do new things, they enable you to grow and transform, and they create the space for more joy, happiness and love to come into your life. Unfortunately, we can stand in our own way. The idea of change is scary—we are not always comfortable with the unknown. So we end up holding on to what we do know, what is familiar and comfortable, often at the expense of our own wonderful future that is waiting to emerge. In the end, the very things we do to protect ourselves from potential “harm” are the very things that imprison us from potential growth and well-being.

It is so important to not only embrace change and transitions but to invite and welcome them to us. So whether you are someone who tries to block change or make change happen, there is a middle ground. It’s the place from which you let go and let in. Sometimes easier said than done, I know.  So in order to help you with this endeavor, I am offering five steps to help facilitate the art of letting go and letting in.

BIG NEWS! My radio/internet TV show “Pathways to Love” on LATalkLive will be moving to a new day and time. Starting April 14^th you can catch us LIVE every Sunday at 1:30pm PST at www.latalklive.com/new/pathways-to-love. As always, call in with your questions and comments at 323-247-7443! (Until then, you can still watch us live on Fridays, 2:30pm PST and always catch the archived recorded shows at www.latalklive.com/new/pathways-to-love)

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Is Having Sex With Your Ex a Good Idea?

Coming to terms with the end of a relationship is one of the most difficult transitions that relationships offer. It is complicated and often a non-linear path to “un-attach” oneself to someone you have come to know as your other half. To make matters worse, if you are the one who still wants the relationship to continue, you may find yourself compromising your values and morals in order to find a way to pull your significant other back in. Even if you are the one who initiated the ending, you may also find yourself pulled back to your ex as you navigate the waters of letting go. See if the following scenario rings a bell for you or someone you know. You officially have called it quits. One night your ex calls and invites you to dinner. You accept the invitation. You tell yourself you did so because you want to get the books you left at the house. But if truth be told, you really accepted the invitation because you’re feeling lonely and miss being around someone so familiar. When you arrive at the house, it feels good to be back in familiar territory—food, wine, and conversation flows—and before you know it, you find yourself having a passionate interlude with your ex. After the passion subsides, you wonder if you did the right thing. It felt like a good idea about an hour ago but now you’re feeling a little worried. Sound familiar?

Don’t forget to join me for my LIVE “Turning Disappointment into Intimate Connections” Workshop on February 26, 7 – 8:30pm at The Mystic Journey Bookstore in Venice, California. For more information and to register, go to http://www.mysticjourneybookstore.com/saleitem.php#WS0226

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7 Reasons to Acknowledge Anniversaries

Anniversaries are important milestones in every relationship. Whether it’s the one year mark since your first date or your 10th wedding anniversary, acknowledging and celebrating these annual milestones are more important than you think. Here are seven reasons why... Don’t forget to join me for my LIVE Create Your Pathway to Love Workshop on February 23, 9am-1pm in Hermosa Beach, California. For more information and to register, go to www.yourpathwaytolove.eventbrite.com.

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