marriage – Julie Orlov

Funny Quote for the Week!

I wanted to keep it light and funny this week, so enjoy the quote of the week!

"We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops."

Whatever works to keep your marriage working, do it with a smile on your face and good intentions from your heart.

Have a great week!

Julie

P.S. If you or someone you know is wanting to create a life filled with purpose and love, please don’t hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized counseling and coaching. Take advantage of the opportunity to receive the support and guidance you deserve. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today.

About me: www.julieorlov.com/about

About The Pathway to Love at-home program: www.julieorlov.com/pathway-to-love

About your relationship: Get your Free Relationship Assessment Quiz at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

Too Scared to Leave, Too Painful to Stay

You've tried everything. You've seen counselors and therapists. You tried agreeing with your spouse. You tried ignoring your spouse. You tried arguing with your spouse. You tried to be the best partner you can be. But you are still miserable. You know that this marriage is not working. You know that your spouse is not the right person for you. You've spent years trying to fix, deny and ignore the problems. You've done everything but leave. Why? Because you've been just too scared.

People stay in bad relationships and marriages longer than they should because they're scared. They're scared of

Failing
Being alone
Financial destitution
Retaliation from their spouse/partner for leaving
Going through the pain of separation and divorce
Putting their children through separation and divorce
And mostly, The Unknown.

It takes courage and a commitment to living your best life to leave a marriage. It takes a willingness to jump off the cliff (metaphorically speaking) and trust that you will land on your feet, all the while not knowing how far you will fall before reaching solid ground. It takes believing in yourself and knowing that you have what it takes to survive anything and thrive because of it. It takes a leap of faith when you don't believe in yourself and your future. And lastly, it simply takes taking that last step away from the cliff and allowing yourself to "fall."

There's no special trick in taking that last step into the unknown. It only takes you. No promises, no guarantees. It just takes that one moment when you say "Enough is enough; I'm done."

What will it take for you to choose you? Who will you go to for support and guidance along the way? When will you decide that an unknown future is better than what you have today?

Your life is now. You choose.

If you or someone you know is scared to leave a marriage or committed relationship, please don't hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help. I provide personalized guidance and coaching. And if you want to start right now, go and purchase The Pathway to Love at-home program. You don’t need to wait. You can begin the process today. Take advantage of the opportunity receive the support and guidance you deserve.

Be well,

Julie

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

5 Things To Do When The Rug has Been Pulled Out From Under You

You think you know your significant other. You feel secure in this relationship and believe that all is well. That is until one day, you get the rug pulled out from under you. You discover your significant other has a sexually transmitted disease, you discover your spouse is addicted to porn, you discover your partner was really married twice, not once before you met.

You feel like you've been hit in the stomach--not only because of what you've learned but also because your ability to trust has been shattered--not only the ability to trust your loved one, but your ability to trust yourself.

These kinds of upsets happen and they happen when you least expect it. Last week, I described all the reasons why people may not disclose everything about themselves to their partner. One of the reasons is they feel shame around the issue. Another reason is they know the relationship would be at risk. So when their worst fears are met and the secret is revealed, you must deal with the painful truth about who your partner is and what he or she has done.

Dealing with these kinds of surprises is complicated. There are many feelings and issues to address and work through. So while I am giving you an abbreviated version of what those things are, I encourage you to seek support if and when you find yourself on the floor with the rug pulled out.

Here are 5 things to help you get back on your feet.

5 Signs Your Marriage is At Risk

You and your spouse just had another fight about money. You have argued about money for years, never agreeing on spending and saving habits. This time, the fight turned uglier than usual. There was a lot of name calling and threats of divorce. You both have had it. You just don't believe you will ever see eye to eye and are burned out. At this point, you aren't sure you want to stay married. And although you have had these kinds of arguments many times over the past 12 years, this time you believe the marriage is at risk. But is it??

Arguing is normal. Conflict is inevitable. Ups and downs are part of a long-term marriage. So when does an ebb run the risk of becoming the beginning of the end or the end itself? Here are five signs that indicate your marriage is at risk. Click Read in Browser to access the full article now!

Did You Know January is The Month of Divorce?

Did you know that the highest number of people filing for divorce occurs each January? This occurs for several reasons including

Most people don't have the heart to file for divorce and leave their spouse during the holidays—especially if they have kids.
People often wait to see if their spouse will do something, anything, to save the marriage and more often than not, they end up falling short. Furthermore, most of the time the spouse did not even know that this final test was in place.
People begin to realize that their family life is not what they thought it was. They determine that the relationship is so bad that staying for the sake of their children no longer makes sense. They experience so much disappointment during the holidays that their last hope dissolves.
Spouses drink too much, eat too much, argue too much, stress out too much. Sometimes this is the straw that breaks the camel's back.

If you find yourself getting ready to file for divorce and throw in the towel, you might want to wait until February. Take the time to make sure that your marriage is truly over and not the victim of the pre and post-holiday drama. It is definitely worth taking one more look to see if there's any possibility to turn things around.

If you or someone you know is contemplating divorce, contact me today! Investing in a session to see if there marriage can be revived is well worth it. Soliciting the help of a qualified licensed professional will ensure that you've covered all your bases and can determine next steps with peace of mind. And believe me, working on your marriage is far less expensive than navigating a legal divorce. You're worth it, you're family is worth it, and your marriage is worth it. Call today at 310-379-5855 or 1-888-997-2847 or email me to schedule your consultative session today.

Be well,

Julie

P.S. Don't forget to catch my radio/TV show Pathways to Love w'Julie Orlov LIVE every Sunday 1:30pm PST on LATalkLive!

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

Create Relationships in Your Life That Work — learn more at www.julieorlov.com