breakups – Julie Orlov

Are you ready to turn breakup into the best thing that ever happened to you? Find out how!

Because I know that relationships that take a huge hit around this time of year leaving many people reeling from the heartache of a breakup and wondering if you will ever find a love that lasts, I knew you’d want to see this.

My friend Alicia is hosting The Modern Girl’s Breakup Guide, an interview series that brings together some of the top experts on love, relationships, dating, and healing to help you survive your breakup, reclaim your life, and find happiness and true love again AND I’ve been invited to share my best tips and strategies as a part of this series.

Breakups suck.

Do you remember the first time your heart was broken? Maybe it was the schoolyard crush that didn’t even know you existed. Or maybe it was a more recent partner who swore that he/she couldn’t live without you but somehow is still breathing just fine now that he/she has left you.

You’re not alone. Pretty much every adult over a certain age has experienced at least one completely devastating heartbreak that left them asking: will I EVER find true love?!

As you might imagine, after a couple of failed attempts at love too many people either become fearful of fully opening up to someone new or might even feel so broken that they decide to totally give up on love altogether!

Either way, the end result is that you may end up shutting yourself off from the absolute BEST part of a life well-lived: Unconditional Love.

That’s exactly why I’m so excited to be a part of The Modern Girl’s Breakup Guide Interview Series hosted by Alicia where I have teamed up with some of the top experts on love, relationships, attraction, and healing to help mend broken hearts everywhere!

Be honest, have you ever asked yourself…

Why is it that some people just seem to be lucky in love?

Is it possible to find love after a failed relationship with someone who I thought was my soulmate?

Will I ever experience a love that fulfills me and lasts forever?

When will it be my turn for “happily-ever-after”?

If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, keep reading.

I know that going through a breakup can be excruciating.

I also know that people who are able to turn their breakups into opportunities for self-growth and rediscovery have an easier time not only “getting over” their breakups, but are actually better able to create significant breakthroughs both in love and in life.

The Modern Girl’s Breakup Guide Interview Series is packed full of strategies that will change the way you approach love. But that’s not all! When you show up live, you will also receive amazing bonuses that are sure to supercharge your healing and open you up deep, lasting love.

If you are ready to transform your breakup into a breakthrough, I invite you to join me in The Modern Girl’s Breakup Guide Interview Series today. You can listen to my interview with Alicia on December 20^th.

Click here now http://themoderngirlsbreakupguide.com/julieorlov for FREE access.

Be well,

Julie

P.S. A word of caution: getting over a breakup takes time and courage. The Modern Girl’s Breakup Guide approach is based on 100% self-love above all else, which means that you don’t have to rush and you definitely don’t have to “become” anything or anyone else in order to be worthy of real, deep, lasting love. What you DO have to commit to throughout this process is YOU.

About me: www.julieorlov.com/about

About The Pathway to Love at-home program: www.julieorlov.com/pathway-to-love

About your relationship: Get your Free Relationship Assessment Quiz at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

5 Predictors of Divorce (and what you can do about it)

I have worked with thousands of couples throughout the years. I have seen and heard it all. But when it comes down to relationships and marriages ending, there are really 5 basic reasons that exist. And while some marriages are better off coming to a close, most marriages could have been saved if the couple had only been able to shift these 5 things. Please share this information with others. It just might save their marriage.

You and/or your spouse need to win or be right. I can’t tell you how destructive this is to a marriage. It is far better to seek understanding rather than focusing all your energy on being right. We’ve all heard “It is better to be happy than to be right.” But most couples continue to dig deeper holes during arguments. Learn how to approach conflict differently. Once you learn how to deal with conflict effectively, you will find yourself feeling satisfied and connected, not frustrated and angry.
You and/or your spouse spend significant time soliciting agreement from friends and family on making the other spouse “the bad guy.” Friends and family will typically support you and your take on how things went down. The more you get agreement from others, the less likely you are to look at things from another perspective and take responsibility for your own actions and feelings. You are destined to become the victim; and unfortunately, this may also mean a victim of divorce.
You and/or your spouse are committed to finding evidence that the other is and will continue to hurt, betray, disappoint, and abandon you. When you have decided that your spouse is ____________ (fill in the blank), you may become too attached to making this true. When this happens, you will look to the past, present, and future and will inevitable find evidence for why this is so. You will skew history, distort the present, and see only what you want to see. In these cases, you truly are committed to a failed marriage.
You and/or your spouse express contempt. This can take many forms. It can be an overtly nasty comment, a lack of responsiveness altogether, or a passive-aggressive behavior such as neglecting responsibilities. When you begin to deal with marital problems in this way, you immediately give the message that the marriage and your spouse hold little regard. This quickly causes irreparable damage. Too much contempt over a long period of time may be cause for divorce. Staying in a contemptuous marriage too long eats away at the soul of everyone involved. Change the behaviors or get out.
You and/or your spouse engage in outside activities that destroy trust and workability. These activities include extra-marital affairs, addictions, and keeping other serious secrets. A healthy marriage is all about openness, honesty, and trust. When this is broken in a significant way, it takes a long time with consistent sustained effort to rebuild that trust. Yes, it can be done. However, if these activities continue to show up time and time again, the marriage will always be broken and empty, even if you decide to stay together. Furthermore, you can count on a lot of pain to carry you through the years.

If you recognize any of these behaviors in your marriage, get help now. The earlier you set out to do things differently, the better your chances for turning things around. Early intervention is the key. If you feel like you’re on the brink of divorce, there may still be a chance your marriage can be saved. While changing the dynamics of a marriage is never easy, it can be done. I can help you make a paradigm shift in how you relate to yourself and your spouse. Once you get the process down, you just might find yourself in a whole new relationship with the person you fell in love with and decided to marry. One phone call may just change your life. Don’t wait. Do it now! I can be reached at 888-99PATHS FREE or julie@julieorlov.com

As always, I’m here to support you in creating strong and powerful relationships.

Be well,
Julie

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com

Create Relationships in Your Life That Work — learn more at www.julieorlov.com

Did You Know January is The Month of Divorce?

Did you know that the highest number of people filing for divorce occurs each January? This occurs for several reasons including

Most people don't have the heart to file for divorce and leave their spouse during the holidays—especially if they have kids.
People often wait to see if their spouse will do something, anything, to save the marriage and more often than not, they end up falling short. Furthermore, most of the time the spouse did not even know that this final test was in place.
People begin to realize that their family life is not what they thought it was. They determine that the relationship is so bad that staying for the sake of their children no longer makes sense. They experience so much disappointment during the holidays that their last hope dissolves.
Spouses drink too much, eat too much, argue too much, stress out too much. Sometimes this is the straw that breaks the camel's back.

If you find yourself getting ready to file for divorce and throw in the towel, you might want to wait until February. Take the time to make sure that your marriage is truly over and not the victim of the pre and post-holiday drama. It is definitely worth taking one more look to see if there's any possibility to turn things around.

If you or someone you know is contemplating divorce, contact me today! Investing in a session to see if there marriage can be revived is well worth it. Soliciting the help of a qualified licensed professional will ensure that you've covered all your bases and can determine next steps with peace of mind. And believe me, working on your marriage is far less expensive than navigating a legal divorce. You're worth it, you're family is worth it, and your marriage is worth it. Call today at 310-379-5855 or 1-888-997-2847 or email me to schedule your consultative session today.

Be well,

Julie

P.S. Don't forget to catch my radio/TV show Pathways to Love w'Julie Orlov LIVE every Sunday 1:30pm PST on LATalkLive!

Julie Orlov, psychotherapist, speaker, and author of The Pathway to Love: Create Intimacy and Transform Your Relationships through Self-Discovery

Retrieve Your FREE Relationship Assessment Quiz and see if YOUR Relationship is on track at www.julieorlov.com/quiz

Create Relationships in Your Life That Work — learn more at www.julieorlov.com